Galahad (Saber, Ready For Evaluation)

[Galahad]

Saber



"My good blade carves the casques of men,
My tough lance thrusteth sure,
My strength is as the strength of ten,
Because my heart is pure."

[/color][/b][/color]: // Galahad
OTHER ALIAS[/color]: // Good Knight, Pure Knight, Gwalchavad
CURRENT AGE[/color]: // Approx. 18-21
YEAR OF BIRTH[/color]: // unknown
GENDER[/color]: // Male
ALIGNMENT[/color]: // Lawful Good
OCCUPATION[/color]: // Knight of the Round Table, Church Acolyte
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[/color][/b][/color]: //

the more correct appearance www.nattoli.net/art/669/galahad-fate%2Fstay-night

HEIGHT

[/color]: // 5'6"
WEIGHT[/color]: // 62 kg.
EYE COLOR[/color]: // Indigo
HAIR COLOR[/color]: // Dark Blonde
PIERCINGS[/color]: // None
TATTOOS[/color]: // None
DISTINGUISHING FEATURES[/color]: // Armor parts worn are decorated with crosses
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[/color][/b][/color]: //

• Protective
  
  • Galahad as a knight is protective to those who are weak and oppressed. He is also protective to his master and will do his best to keep him/her from harm.
  
  
• Moral
  
  • As a Pure Knight, Galahad will do his best to do what is good and just. Like in the legends, He fights for what is good and would not let evil reign.
  
  
• Chaste
  
  • Being the pure knight, Galahad follows the way of celibacy. Sometimes, he gets irritated when people talk "deeper" about birds and bees. Hates pornography.
  
  
• Zeal
  
  • Galahad will always be loyal to his ideals unless proven wrong. He would stand and fight like a crusader and sometimes think like a church member. However his zeal, affected by great faith, makes him near suicidal and sometimes makes him act either an emo or a jerk (Refer to Shinn Asuka from gundam seed destiny) .
  
  

LIKES

[/color]: // Honor, Justice, Peace and Faith
DISLIKES[/color]: // Injustice, Cruelty, and Tyranny
STRENGTHS[/color]: //

Galahad is a powerful defense fighter due to the Shield of Evalach and his magic resistance. Furthermore, he possess the Aegis of Faith that even increases his defense against dark arts.
WEAKNESSES[/color]: //
May appear to be hypocritical in some people's perspective, and sometimes his morality may get in his way.
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MY LEGEND: //

[/color] en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galahad
MY HISTORY[/color]: //

I am the son of Sir Lancelot du Lac and Lady Elaine out of wedlock. As a boy, I was place under the care of my great aunt who was an abbess at a nunnery where I was raised.

Upon reaching manhood, I was reunited with my father who knighted me and was brought to His Majesty King Arthur's court at Camelot during Pentecost. I was led by a very aged knight over to the Round Table where he unveiled a seat at the Siege Perilous. It was an unused chair that was kept vacant for the chosen knight who will accomplish the Holy Grail Quest. It was fatal for others who aspired to sit there but I miraculously survived the test. His Royal Highness himself witnessed the event and no sooner led me to a river where a sword lies in a stone with the inscription, "Never shall a man take me hence only he by whose side i ought to hang....." I accomplished the test. The King then invited me to become a Knight of the Round Table but soon afterwards, an ethereal vision of the Holy Grail appeared in his court and my journey began at once.

Five days after my journey began, I met King Baudemagus and Yvain the Bastard. I discovered the Shield of Evalach without opposition. However, when King Baudemagus tried to take it, a White Knight appeared and seriously wounded him. The knight then ordered the King's squire Melias to deliver the shield to me. I knighted Melias and continued my journey. Since then I fought more foes, rescued allies and maidens, and acquired the Sword with Strange Straps in a mysterious ship. At the end of my journey with Sir Bors and Sir Perceval, we acquired the Holy Grail of Christ and brought it to Sarras where we were unjustly imprisoned but later released by the dying and repentant King Escorant. The people of Sarras then appointed me to be their King and for one year I ruled over them. During my reign, I felt content and prayed that I might finally rest in peace. My prayer was answered as the Grail of Christ vanished along with my life.....


MY GOALS[/color]: // To investigate about the existence of an another "Holy Grail" and stop anyone who wishes to use it in evil purposes.

[/color][/b][/color]: // Sword (Strange Straps), Shield (Evalach), knife (normal blessed weapon)
NOBLE PHANTASM[/color]: //

Shield of Evalach ~ Blessed Shield
Rank: B
Type: Defensive
Range: melee
Max Targets: 1

Originally a holy shield with a device of a red cross given by Josephus, son of Joseph of Arimathea to the Saracen King Evalach, It was coveted by King Baudemagus. However, a White Knight appeared and took it away from him and ordered the King's squire to give it to Galahad. It decreases the damage done of any attack (including noble phantasms) by one level while causing a small fraction of damage against the attacker if he/she uses a melee attack.

Shield of Evalach ~ Healing Cross
Rank: B
Type: Support
Range: 1-10
Max Targets: 1

The Shield of Evalach was marked with a bloody cross by Josephus, Son of Joseph of Arimathea. The cross grants healing/regeneration to Galahad or any one target close to the shield. Grants triple speed regeneration/healing to a servant target (based on servant regeneration) and 7 times to a living biological target

Strange Straps
Rank: A
Type: Anti-Army
Range: 1-33
Max Targets: 1-900 people

King Solomon, knowing that his descendant will become the greatest knight in the world, he wanted to give a gift to this special warrior. He decided to give the sword of King David, his late father, to that man. However, the sword fell into the hands of unworthy hands, who's lives were ended or cursed due to their defiance of it's prophecy. It is said that the weapon has destroyed two warring kingdoms in a moment and punished those who aren't fit to use it and still tried. To unworthy people, activating it's power will unleash an explosive force around the caster and deals massive damage to those around him and himself. For Solomon or David who are the original owners of the blade, it will create a Star of David emblem around the caster and creates the same explosion except the damage done would not affect the user. For Galahad,a cross appears underneath him as he stands at the center and causes the same effect to Solomon and David's version of the attack.

CLASS ABILITIES[/color]: //
Magic Resistance

A: Cancel spells below A-Rank. In practice, the Servant is untouchable to modern magi.

Riding

B: Most creatures can be rode with above average skill. However, cannot ride those of Demonic Beast and Holy Beast-rank.

SKILLS[/color]: //
Chaste Knight

A: restrains from having sex or even kissing, making Galahad immune to seduction or charm

Aegis of Faith

A+++: A pseudo-supernatural protection that springs from religious faith. Protecting the body and mind from harm.

Instinct

The power to "feel" the most favorable developments for oneself during battle.

A: Refined sixth sense is now close to true precognition. Bonus effect of reducing by half the penalties caused by obstructed vision and hearing.

STRENGTH

[/color]: // B
ENDURANCE[/color]: // A
AGILITY[/color]: // B
MANA[/color]: // C
LUCK[/color]: // B
NOBLE PHANTASM[/color]: // A
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[/color][/b][/color]: // galahad
FACE CLAIM[/color]: // Blonde Crusader, Ragnarok Online
OTHER CHARACTERS[/color]: // N/A for now
MISC. INFORMATION[/color]: // N/A for now
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[Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri]

This profile is incomplete (Looks like something got cut off from a copy paste or something). Please fix it before I begin an actual evaluation. Thank you~

[Galahad]

already done. sorry for my phone's limits.

[Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri]

You need an Avatar there, Galahad~ And you need to resize your picture to fit the boards formats. A little over the 650 limit is fine, but yours is rather resized by the board, and causes problems for some viewers.

Ok, now for the proper evaluation, Gally. First of all, your appearance section is supposed to contain a link, or a description of how the person looks, especially if they appear different than the faceclaim (For other’s writing convenience.) Since your armour parts have crosses on them, a little bit of a description of any possible differences, or just a few links would be nice.

Moving on into the personality… I always hate saying this, but it is rather short. Also Piousness is not the same thing as doing what is good and just. Piousness refers to religious devotion, and may contain what they think is good and just, but it’s mostly religious observance. They can also come into confliction in the cases of fighting to save people on ‘holy’ days which do not allow combat.

As much as I would like the history to increase in length, it is longer than the minimum, so I can say nothing real about it.

Weapons: Sword, Shield, and knife. Are the sword and shield referring to Evalach and Strange Straps? Just a clarification, not an actual problem.

Shield of Evalach: No. First of all this isn’t an EX rank effect. In fact it’s theoretically worse than Achilles’/Sigurd’s immunities, as it is a shield and would completely give itself away. Also, despite its supernatural appearance and showing in legend, it doesn’t really have support for this ability either. The shield is more like one that wounds those who takes it up, or is in some sense guarded by the divine.

Strange Straps: You have no description on what it actually does, and it is far too high ranked. Despite what Arthur says to Griflet in La Mort Artu, Excalibur is just better. You won’t be getting A++ for this. Also, how it works/is an AF/etc as a description would be nice~

Skills now, I suppose.

Chaste knight of God: Outright denied. Prana recharge is actually done automatically by Servants, and they always have access to their Master’s prana. The reason the contract works for Arturia is because Shirou is actually draining her prana via Avalon being in his body. Then there is the stat up effect, which is actually more powerful than a large number of phantasms. Also denied. Recharging your prana fully in one day? No. Finally staying in a church as a Servant and a Magus is a seriously bad idea, as a Servant is an active heresy, and may get the church on your tail/your master’s tail. Saving your life with this one.

Finally… if you wish to retool this somehow, it needs a rank.

Bravery: Too high a rank. Galahad did not fight Gods, only dragons at best. Not only that, but his bravery actually is found in his religious conviction, which is actually more or less what Aegis of Faith is. So this skill is too high ranked, and generally useless.

Prana Burst: Galahad honestly has no reason to have this ability. Arturia’s comes from the dragon origin/blood/alignment/thing, which Galahad does not have. Not to mention this approaches the wrong end of being the greatest knight in the world, and his piousness, as it is an elemental (non-divine, but divine spirit, holy beast, etc) blessing that is made to compensate for Arturia’s weakness, as well as explain her feats of strength despite being a rather small frame. Despite your height and weight, Galahad would actually be Roman Average in his time. If everyone here didn’t exaggerate height.

Stats: I understand these are probably so high to show his status as THE GREATEST KNIGHT EVER!, but these are too high (especially the mana rank, which we have an explicit rule against being higher than C without explanation of heritage such as dragon alignment, divine origin, etc.) Not only that, but every knight is THE GREATEST KNIGHT EVER!, in their own legends. Gawain, Percival, Galahad, Tristan, Lancelot, Morien, etc. Pretty much any individual romance will claim their own knight is the greatest in existence, ever, and have them show up anyone else who apparently holds claim to the title. So in general… please decrease the ranks a bit.

Quite a bit of work, sadly…

[Galahad]

good day miss sola. Since i'm in mobile mode, i can't edit my profile now but i wish to know if these corrections are alright: pious is to be replaced with moral. Sword and shield are evalach and straps respectively while dagger is just normal weapon. Evalach is decreased to B rank but I would like to retain it's ability to destroy normal weapons since according to stuart campbell's edition of the book, the shield did splintered lancelot's lance. Strange straps is A rank. It was said that when a certain unrightful king used it, his enemy's kingdom and men were destroyed as well as his but the description was vague. This info was from timelessmyths.com i think so i would like it to appear like a grand cross beneath Galahad with AOE effect. Chaste knight is rank A the effect is Galahad would be immune to seduction tactics since sex is forbidden for him. Strength would be B, Endurance is A still, Agility is B still, Mana is C, Luck is B, and Noble Phantasm is A. I'd like to add a noble phantasm phantom blades rank C since in the legend anyone who gets unrightful the strange straps or the evalach are attacked by phantom weapons or by a white knight. If it's useless or not allowed. I'll take longinus spear as rank B phantasm. Galahad can't use it as a weapon well since he isn't a lancer this time but its healing ability could be utilize to heal almost fatal wounds.

[Galahad]

i'd like to hear ideas for you. Thanks for correcting. ^^

[Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri]

Ah... Longinus is actually held in the real world which puts restrictions on its summoned form (Sealed and owned by the church. It is also somewhat of a no-owner phantasm, as many have wielded it/claimed to wield it/etc), as well as the fact that he heals wounds with it (Only wounds caused by it as well) an odd choice for a phantasm (Sesshomaru?)As much as I want to see an Emo Galahad who stabs himself with his lance to heal himself… no. (Short Answer: Galahad cannot have Longinus.)

Now Strange Straps. This is difficult here. First of all, this is a radial attack so it would probably be anti-army, rather than anti fortress (This does not mean it’s weaker, simply used a different way.) Second… how would this work exactly? A cross explosion (Suddenly that picture from Evangelion comes to mind)? How do you survive being in the center, or does it radiate from you? How does it do damage to the opponent? It also begs the question of how David had a cross explosion causing weapon.

The king being destroyed is somewhat of a curse, as he lost the kingdom as a result of the blade, rather than when he picked it up his country spontaneously exploded.

Evalach: Splintering a lance was pretty common, in fact that can almost be considered the intent of a shield. And Evalach is generally just cursed against user, and tends to have more legends of healing and certain victory than blocking anything specific… If anything this ‘summoned blade’ would come from here, but I am rather iffy on an independent weapon, even if it’s common to some Irish weapons.

Chaste Knight: So basically specific resistance to Charm effects? Which is once again covered by Aegis of Faith I’m fine with that.

Make sure to get the other changes I mentioned as well~

[Galahad]

good day miss sola. I think I'm done or am I? Anyway, please review. Thank you very much for your patience. ^^*

[Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri]

Ok, we still have some problems with Strange Straps (The only problem with Evalach now is I would prefer that you split it into two phantasms. Evalach reducing the attack rank by one level, and Evalach healing for a quarter of received strikes.)

Its range is too long. Excalibur is 1-99 and it’s a focused beam. So its attack is only in a line, it’s not like Excalibur is going to hit 4 kms backwards from where she uses. What you have here is a 360 degree Excalibur. So decrease the area this attack covers.

It’s also too much of an effect. When I asked you if you were immune to your own attack, it was somewhat rhetorical. Especially your allies. Making your own allies immune is on the level of another divine Miracle. I am fine with the explosion emanating from you, but not potentially blowing yourself up.

Charisma: This is… random. Galahad was not the knight who led any forces into battle, ever. Not only that, but at best he ruled a castle. This is not a skill Galahad would have. If you want another skill, perhaps give him instinct, or EotM (Fake). Not this.

So it’s gotten a bit better~ I like the new face claim~

[Galahad]

good day miss sola. Again I'm on mobile mode. I want to consult if my modifications are acceptable. Strange straps range will be 2-34. Standing near to Galahad will harm none so that the master can take cover behind him without fear of being hurt by the explosion (there's a small hole at the center of the cross as a safe zone for the master to seek refuge, like an eye at the center of a storm). Evalach- healing cross will heal any one target based on 1/4 of the last damage received by the shield. If the servant takes the heal, a glow will surround the servant. If anyone else takes it, a beam of light hits the target at a range of 1-5. Thank you very much ^^.

[Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri]

I guess Strange Straps is alright, although a cross isn't really working into a circle, since it is an unbalanced shape. Although it is a sword model.

Evalach I suppose works as well. Just implement all the changes I said, and the approval should come.

[Galahad]

I think I'm done, miss sola. Thanks. ^^

[Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri]

Charisma is still an incorrect skill for Galahad. In addition it conflicts with the massively high rank Aegis of Faith you have, which causes personality disorders at that level (Such as Galahad being unfeeling for normals as he is in myth.) You also need to know that he will have such 'strangeness' at that level of the skill.

In addition, it is not Galahad that is the heretic, but the magecraft that summoned him is heretical to the church. There is no doubt that Galahad, or any other Christian hero, was a Christian champion, however their soul is pulled via Magecraft, making acceptance of him on consecrated ground sacrilege.

Chaste knight is also probably too high 'ranked' make it A, not A+++

[Galahad]

ok. Thanks for the correction. Apologies for forgetting to remove the charisma skill. It should have been EOTM Fake. Chaste knight be reduced to A. Any other corrections? Thanks.

[Galahad]

I would gladly correct any other wrong things here. Thank you for your patience.

[Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri]

You haven't editted your profile yet, Gally~ Please respond afterwards next time, thank you.

[Galahad]

Again, apologies ^^. Sorry for the false alarm. I just have done nerfing chaste knight and removing charisma. If anything else is wrong, I'll be glad to listen. Thank You very much.

[Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri]

Sadly, servants are considered heretics..... So he had to keep away from the church.

I asked you to fix this, but I guess I wasn't specific enough? Basically, he is not a heretic, but the way he was summoned, and his new existence is heretical.

I appear to not be saying these strongly enough, and for that I apologize. But, I did somewhat ask you to detail Galahad's personality quirk in the Aegis of Faith (As high ranks of this skill cause mental oddities.)

In addition, you have too many combat skills. Instinct and EotM (Fake) are like two different ways to fight, its hard to compare, but its like seperate mental processes altogether. So please remove one of them, thanks~

[Galahad]

i hope I'm done this time. Sorry for the uncorrected posts.

[Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri]

I suppose that will be all from me.



The second round may be a little harsh, so watch out~

Oh, a minor matter, but not one to hold approval for. Please capitalize your name~

[Galahad]

Thanks for the approval ^_^

[Sigurd Fafnesbane]

1. Does the shield also downrank Noble Phantasmal attacks? Also, I'm not sure about the breaking weapons part, since that would require a burst of power akin to Prana Burst. Besides, some Servants don't have a fabulous phantasm Lance or Sword or the like, leaving them with nothing. Also, how would you reconcile breaking the other guy's weapon but still getting hurt anyways?

2. It's a bit odd that the shield would heal based on how much of a beating that it took. Perhaps just say that it's a healing apparatus, no numbers involved? Also, you should make a mention that it would be much easier to heal a human than it would a Servant, since the latter works on a different wavelength in terms of bodily functioning.

Lastly, you should probably mention, in greater detail, how messed up Galahad is, due to his abnormally high Aegis of Faith. At that rank, even the best intentioned people would end up falling in the 'He Who Fights Monsters' territory, like Vlad. As a suggestion, Lancelot mentions that Galahad seemed inhuman at times, due to his faith and absolute purity.

[Galahad]

1. yes, it downranks the Noble Phantasmal attacks. About destroying the non-divine weapons, it was based on an account that the shield splintered Lancelot's lance when he attacked Galahad
2.Respectfully, I would like to hear your idea about the healing part, if you have any objections to it. As part of the healing on humans part, I will concur but I would like to hear any ideas from you.
3.okay, I'll think on how I would make him seemingly inhuman.

[Sigurd Fafnesbane]

1. Well, that is what happens in jousts. Lances splinter and smash on shields. Also, add in the bit about it dropping NP attack damage by a rank, too.

2. Eh, this isn't a videogame. We don't need numbers. You won't be healing fatal cuts instantly, but you will be able to regenerate relatively well in a fight, and what not.

Also, what do you mean by ideas? Galahad and Servants are no longer flesh and meat and blood, but prana and ether. That's why it's harder to heal a Servant than it is to heal a human. So it would end up costing a larger amount of prana to heal an equivalent wound for a Servant than it would a human.

[Galahad]

good day, Mr. Sigurd. I hope I have corrected everything I ought to correct. Please do tell me what things that I still need to change. Have a nice day.

[Gilgamesh]

What I meant by the lance splintering was that breaking lances was hardly a legendary occurrence. So you'll have to get rid of that bit in the first phantasm.

[Galahad]

I tweaked some on the profile. I hope it's acceptable.

[Gilgamesh]

[APPROVED 2/2